Drug Rehabilitation that works

Question by its Mrs. Dingleberry to you: has anyone dated a recovered drug addict? Feeling left out… please help!!?
My BF and father of my baby due in June is a good person. He is a recovered drug addict & has done a lot to turn his life around. We have a relationship with very deep feelings & a lot of passion.

However, he goes through these periods where he will completely shut me out (mostly when he is struggling with “inner demons” & issues that are hard for him to process). He will also make comments that hurt my feelings like “why do you have to invade on my time?” when we’re apart & I text him. He usually realizes how he has come off & apologizes…

but I’m wondering, what can I do to avoid feeling so hurt & left out when he withdraws inward, or turns toward his NA or AA friends? I know about AlAnon, but any other suggestions?

Best answer:

Answer by Helen W.
I don’t know how long your BF has been clean/sober. Some of the things you mention sound like the travails of someone who is fairly new at sobriety and who perhaps hasn’t had the benefit of therapy. If so, then perhaps you could gently suggest that “inner demons” can best be dealt with in therapy; NA/AA is not set up to deal with that sort of thing.

As far as him turning toward his NA/AA friends rather than you, please understand that he has been taught to do that in program. They teach that in times of trouble, one is to turn to the group as a primary resource, under the theory that nonaddicts (“normies”) don’t and can’t understand. Naturally, this can lead to some hurt feelings on the part of the nonaddicted loved ones, but when they complain, this serves as “proof” that indeed, normies don’t understand. It’s kind of a catch-22 and something that the loved ones of 12 step program members struggle with all the time.

As far as Al-Anon or Nar-Anon, my experience with those groups has not been positive; in fact, my therapist suggested that I NOT go to such meetings because I would be, as she put it, “the healthiest one in the room” and would get nothing out of it. Turned out she was right.

Give your answer to this question below!

Question by Brittany W: please helpppp if you go too aa meetings alcoholism classes?
do you have to talk or are you ok even if you just listen hows this work i have to go have no idea my first time helppppppppppp

Best answer:

Answer by selina.evans
No one will force you to talk but eventually you should do so, when you are comfortable exposing yourself to the group you are with. Good luck.

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by e_monk

Question by MADHUPRANA G: please state the necessary points that i can include in my project DRUG ADDICTION to make it the best?
explain how to make the project work most interesting?also help me about the necessary pictures and charts that i can include in my project.THANKS!

Best answer:

Answer by wii_rock_6
ha ha! Do your own Homework assignments lazy girl

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Question by Lynn1111: Adults – Do you think this could work or is it doomed? Please explain…?
HE: 41/male. Enjoys surfing, rock climbing, spending time with his dog and prefers being alone rather than with groups of people – but does enjoy going out. Does not drink or do drugs. Ex-drug addict and alcoholic (11 years clean drugs – 3 years clean alcohol). Has “been around the block” and had his FAIR share of one night stands, rocky relationships. Never been in a sober relationship.

SHE: 29/female. Enjoys hiking, spending time with her dog, friends, family. Works in a financial office, full time. Has been in 3 serious relationships, all relationships ended by her – the last relationship 3 years – being isolated by the pothead boyfriend from friends and family. Never did drugs, drinks on occasion.

THEY: Neighbors, great friends. Spend tons of time together hiking, hanging out, talking on the phone. Have the same “sick” sense of humor, both very blunt and honest. Have the same hopes (relationship wise) for the future. Both possibly afraid to approach eachother regarding feelings that go beyond friendship but do a lot of flirting.

Dissect away, please.

Best answer:

Answer by Susan C
he sounds like a confirmed bachelor to me…

What do you think? Answer below!

Question by Lynn1111: Adults? Could this work or is it doomed? Please explain your opinions…?
HE: 41/male. Enjoys surfing, rock climbing, spending time with his dog and prefers being alone rather than with groups of people – but does enjoy going out. Does not drink or do drugs. Ex-drug addict and alcoholic (11 years clean drugs – 3 years clean alcohol). Has “been around the block” and had his FAIR share of one night stands, rocky relationships. Never been in a sober relationship. Talks about women that “check him out” constantly and gets a bit jealous over her talks about other men.

SHE: 29/female. Enjoys hiking, spending time with her dog, friends, family. Works in a financial office, full time. Has been in 3 serious relationships, all relationships ended by her – the last relationship 3 years – being isolated by the pothead boyfriend from friends and family. Never did drugs, drinks on occasion. Talks about her next relationship but admits she’s not ready for one right now. Doesn’t get jealous over HIS talk to her about other women.

THEY: Neighbors, great friends. Spend tons of time together hiking, hanging out, talking on the phone. Have the same “sick” sense of humor, both very blunt and honest. Have the same hopes (relationship wise) for the future. Both possibly afraid to approach eachother regarding feelings that go beyond friendship but do a lot of flirting.

Dissect away, please.

Best answer:

Answer by PB
I think he sounds like trouble waiting to happen. And not the good kind. He obviously doesnt know how to put himself in another’s shoes (jealous/hurt of your action but does the same thing), which is a terrifying sign at 41, and has a wreck of a past, which basically leaves you with no reason to think this is a good idea except that you get along and like some of the same things. Sounds like a nice friendship to me, nightmare as a relationship.

What do you think? Answer below!

Question by Astro girl: Can you please tell me about Edgar Allan Poe’s life, and How it influenced his work?
I know he had a very tragic life, from the beginning, when his dad left his mom, when she was pregnant with him, and later she dies when poe was really young. And then his marriage to his 13 year old cousin, when he was 26. His, alcoholism, gambling, and later dieing at only at the age of 40.
All of them has a noted influence in his works, but I cant seem to grasp it well..

Best answer:

Answer by Carol M
It contributes to the darkness of his work. Also, his wife’s illness caused him to work really hard and write great work, but also become very pressured and depressed.

What do you think? Answer below!

Question by hunnerbunner: What treatment works to stop addiction? Former addicts answers please…?
I know that there are lots of theories out there.

Is there any hope? Or is one plan just as likely to fail as all others?

My son is addicted. His drug of choice is DXM. He’ll take anything though…and I mean anything if he thinks it will get him high.
He’s living in our home and we wanted to allow him time to try and beat this on his own but it’s not happening. He steals our cars, our money, our medicines, and he set up a camera to get the combination in order to get into our safe and take what was there. I’m tired of this new life I live.
I love him and don’t want to kick him to the streets but he’s not willing to go get help.

I have no complete faith in any treatment because there is nothing that is sure to work, at least it doesn’t seem so. He’s 18 and so we could unload thousands upon thousands in a treatment program just to watch him walk away from it and we’d be stuck with the bill. He no longer has a conscience and so he would not care that he did this to us.

Best answer:

Answer by sourcherry119
I’m so sorry that your son has started a life of addiction so young. Regardless of age or drug of choice, addiction is so mind boggling and emotionally frustrating – you want to cut them off in hopes they change, and they don’t,.. and it gets worse .. so for fear of their lives you help them.. and the cycle ends up perpetuating.

There are treatments for addiction but they all require some sort of co-operation from the addict – in the end, nothing will change if they don’t want to.
Medication is available to help, psychotherapy or counselling, and support groups as well.

You should know that this CAN be treated… don’t always look at it as failure even though there is a lot of it. It takes so much perseverance and is so damn difficult – but sometimes we have to draw the line and let them take control of their own life.

The best option in my own opinion is an intervention. The addict doesn’t always realize how they are effecting others they care about or even the extent that others care about them. They don’t always see your sacrifice or your emotional pain… just waiting and dealing with their own hell. This doesn’t mean they are deliberately selfish.. it’s just how addiction works.

If you would like to do research – I would suggest watching the tv show “Intervention”. of course it is television – so not always accurate.. but it gives a good representation of addiction from both sides of the battle and how an intervention works. Perhaps consulting with a therapist or counselor from your area who could lead the intervention if it was too overwhelming to do yourself.

I really wish the best of luck to you and your significant other. I admire you for doing the best you can with what you have … it’s such a difficult struggle. I hope your son finds his way again.
- Kaylynn

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Question by sairamehnaz: Can you please tell me about Edgar Allan Poe’s life, and How it influenced his work?
I know he had a very tragic life, from the beginning, when his dad left his mom, when she was pregnant with him, and later she dies when poe was really young. And then his marriage to his 13 year old cousin, when he was 26. His, alcoholism, gambling, and later dieing at only at the age of 40.
All of them has a noted influence in his works, but I cant seem to grasp it well..

Best answer:

Answer by D J
He lived for tragedy. His life was one. He gambled, drank and had crude relations with women of all sorts- family and not.

Look at his works- they are all of horror and/or mystery. The guy is a perfect symbol for all things considered dark and morbid. Most of his poetry is about death or the unspeakable things. He was a sensation/still is because he knew no limits. He crossed the line in his literature often to cause unease, discomfort and to invoke the thrill we all inside for the morbid and terrifying.

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I am writing about alcohol, anxiety and stress and really need some information to examine each of these. If you could please respond to these questions it would greatly be appreciated. Thanks so much for taking the time to stop and read this:)

Why do you think other people drink alcohol?
1. To relax
2. Improve sleep
3. Increase confidence
4. For the taste
5. Socially acceptable
6. Religious belief
7. To make them attractive
8. Romantic/Sexual reasons
Your answer (select one # from above list) _____________

1 Do you feel you are a normal drinker? (“normal” – drink as much or less than most other people)
2 Has your drinking ever resulted in your being hospitalized in a psychiatric ward?
3. Have you ever awakened the morning after some drinking the night before and found that you
could not remember a part of the evening?
4. After heavy drinking have you ever had delirium tremens (D.T.’s), severe shaking, visual or
auditory (hearing) hallucinations?
5. Has drinking ever created problems between you and a near relative or close friend?
6 Does any near relative or close friend ever worry or complain about your drinking?
7. Have you ever neglected your obligations, your family, or your work for two or more days in a
row because you were drinking?
8. Have you ever been hospitalized because of drinking?
9. Have you ever gone to anyone for help about your drinking?
10. Do you ever feel guilty about your drinking?
11. Have you been arrested more than once for driving under the influence of alcohol?
12. Have you ever gotten into trouble at work because of drinking?
13. Have you ever lost friends because of your drinking?
14. Can you stop drinking without difficulty after one or two drinks?
15. Have you ever lost a job because of drinking?
16. Have you ever been arrested, even for a few hours because of other behavior while drinking?
(If Yes, how many times____________)
17. Have you ever been told you have liver trouble such as cirrhosis?
18 Have you ever gotten into physical fights when drinking?
19. Has any family member or close friend gone to anyone for help about your drinking?
20. Do you drink before noon fairly often?
21. Have you ever gone to any doctor, social worker, clergyman or mental health clinic for help with
any emotional problem in which drinking was part of the problem?
22. Have you ever attended a meeting of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA)?

WITHIN THE LAST MONTH HAVE YOU:
Please respond “Yes” or “No” for each question.

23 Did you hold your breath, have breathing pauses, or stop breathing in your sleep?
24 Did you snore loudly?
25 Did you have restless or “crawling” feelings in your legs at night that went away if you moved
your legs?
26. Did you have nightmares, or did you scream walk, punch, or kick in your sleep?
27. Did the following things disturb you in your sleep: pain, other physical symptoms, worries,
medications, or other (specify)?
28. Did you feel anxious
29. Did you fall asleep unintentionally or have to fight to stay awake during the day?
30. Did work or other activities prevent you from getting enough sleep?
31. Did you have repeated rhythmic leg jerks or leg twitches during your sleep?
32. Did you have difficulty falling asleep?
33. Did sleep difficulties or daytime sleepiness interfere with your daily activities??

USING A SCALE FROM 1=“not at all untypical of me” TO 5=”very typical of me” FOR EACH BELOW
1=NEVER 2=RARELY 3=SOMETIMES 4=OCCASSIONALY 5=OFTEN
Write the number from the above list that most likely represents your behavior.

33. Many situations make me worry.
34. I worry about projects until they are all done
35. Once I start worrying, I cannot stop.
36. I worry all the time.
37. If I do not have enough time to do everything, I do not worry about it.________
38. I know I should not worry about things, but I just cannot help it.
39. As soon as I finish one task, I start to worry about everything else I have to do.
40. When I am under pressure I worry a lot
41. I do not tend to worry about things.__________
42. I notice that I have been worrying about things.
43. I never worry about anything
44. I never worry about anything.
45. I am always worrying about something.
46. I find it easy to dismiss worrisome thoughts
47. I have been a worrier all my life.
48. When there is nothing more I can do about a concern, I do not worry about it anymore.
49. My worries overwhelm me.__________

i am 20 year old guy.
I weigh 62 kgs and 175cm tall.
i have been doing jogging for the past 1 week(daily).
I run three kilometres.
I regularly do yoga meditation for 20 minutes before jogging.
The other day when i jog i felt as though my blood pressure went low and i felt tired the entire day.
Why our BP goes low when we exercise?
Can I continue to jog or should i increase my weight and then jog?
I also heard too much jogging is harmful like addiction.
what is the maximum duration you can jog daily?
PLEASE BE INFORMATIVE.