Question by : Do you think “tough love” is a good method to assist people with alcoholism and other forms of addiction?
My aunt is an alcoholic, and it is really putting a lot of strain on my family. I went to see one of the social-workers at SANCA (the South African National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence). she suggested my family and I go for a course on “tough-love” to rectify the situation. Whilst I acknowledge that our current approach (giving her money etc when she needs it), is not working, tough love seems cruel to me. I definitely do not want my aunt (who is currently unemployed) to land up on the street. I feel she would probably sink even deeper into her alcoholism as living on the streets is very traumatic. Moreover, the monetary decisions are not in my hands – they are decided by my father and uncle (who support her). I do not want to encourage my family to take an approach to my aunt’s addiction that would cause irreparable psychological damage.
What are your views on this matter?
Thanks to all who answer, I appreciate your input.
Best answer:
Answer by Wendell Tough Love is a strong approach. It requires you to draw a boundary and stick to it. If you are not willing to keep to the established boundaries you set up it will not help.
Alcoholics begin their road to recovery when they hit bottom. This can be different for each individual. I have known some who lost a job and that was enough. I know others who ended up homeless and in a run down motel decided it was enough.
I do not know what it will take for your Aunt to hit bottom. I suspect your father and uncle make it relatively easy for her to keep her patterns of use.
I want to connect you to an article about how to stop enabling.
Question by Johnny B. Goode: Can you get on state disability for having depression, alcoholism and panic attacks? I have all 3. I can?
barely drive because of extreme panic attacks that started in 2000 when I was in a bad car accident, a drunk driver hit and ran me. I have been marginally employed the past 10 years, and haven’t worked in 3 years.
Best answer:
Answer by Ginny Jin You might get something but be prepared for a rigorous assessment.
Question by Count Acumen: Do you agree with this definition of alcoholism, if not what would you change?
alcoholism (definition)-
addiction to alcohol: dependence on alcohol consumption to an extent that adversely affects social and work-related functioning and produces withdrawal symptoms when intake is stopped or greatly reduced
Best answer:
Answer by Kerry h Yes, I agree. It’s a good definition.
Question by : Does Poland have a problem with alcoholism?
I have just returned from a trip to Kracow. It was really lovely.
However, One thing that really struck me was the amount of 24 hour alcohol shops. We were in one and a sorry looking chap who was obviously already very drunk came in and bought some booze. I thought it was irresponsible to serve him more but I don’t think if I was working on my own in the shop, that I would be brave enough to refuse. Then on our journeys, we walked a lot, we came across lots of broken booze bottles in hidden places, like under bridges or in a side street. Then this morning we saw the same chap we had seen before, being spoken to by the police. It seemed he had been begging, judging by the cup he had and few zlotys in it.
It made me wonder if Poland had a major alcoholism problem? The 24 hour shops seems crazy! Who needs booze 24 hours?
It didn’t taint our view at all. After all, I come from Scotland. We certainly have a booze problem!
Best answer:
Answer by Isolde Honora Possibly but then again, all cultures are different. I know quite a few Polish people and none of them have alcohol problems.
I’m guessing it’s just a lack of Laws in place. If they didn’t exist here then you can be sure that Off Licenses would take advantage of it too.
Question by Anonymous: Should i suggest Medical Marijuanna as an alternative to my fathers alcoholism?
My dad has been drinking practically all his life and my grandfather was also an alcoholic. my dad lost his job, his car, and his marriage to alcoholism. I’ve read in articles such as, http://hamsnetwork.org/mm/, that marijuana can be a safer alternative to alcoholism and I’ve been considering it for a while. my father already attends AA meetings but it isn’t working for him at all. I try to convince him that drinking is bad for him, but he just dismisses the conversation and acts like my opinion doesn’t matter because he is older than I am. he tells me that he will be proud to die from drinking but I don’t want that to happen. please let me know what you think about marijuana as an alternative to alcoholism, and if you disagree, I would love to hear other solutions to alcoholism.
Best answer:
Answer by Mr.Lucky it is a very good solution…for you…!!..my point is,your dad has to accept that idea,it has to come from him,he has to WANT to do so,yes it is possible,but only if he has to will to do that…i did the opposite…start to drink beer in order to quit smoking pot,i tought beer helped me to go sleep and bypass the cold turkey,but….now i have a beer problem…wich one is worse?(better)?…but yes…if he can smoke pot without drinking,it is better to do so…he has to go to source of the problem i think the best way to quit addictions is ..first,want to change(obviously your dad wants to since he is AA)…second,take him to a good accupuncturist….it worked for me for other addictions and i’m considering doing it again for my beer/pot habit…good luck!
Question by pauletterx: Catholic Annulment Grounds… Alcoholism?
Is alcoholism a valid reason for a catholic annulment? At the time of the marriage I knew my ex was a recovering alcoholic, but what I did not know was that he was still drinking, but doing a good job of hiding it. He was also sleeping with a girl he worked with and doing a good job of hiding that also.
Right before we got married we were so busy preparing for our wedding & we started working opposite shifts at our jobs & hardly ever got to see each other, that’s when it all started. I was blind-sided 6 months after our wedding!
That was 4 years ago & now he wants to have the marriage annulled. I am all for it. He said he will admit to the drinking, the adultery, everything. I am just afraid to be turned down. I really miss receiving the Eucarist. Also, since he is the guilty party – can he initiate the annulment?
Thanks for any information in advance!!!
I forgot to mention that we legally divorced 6 months after we married. So we have been legally divorced for 3 & 1/2 years now.
Best answer:
Answer by great gig in the sky Talk to a priest. The adultery will do it on it’s own. The drinking is just icing.
Hope everything works out for you.
First stop animation. Made this just to see how hard it would be. edit: Seeing as though people have been watching this some lately and I just found my camera I’ve been working on a new one. And yes this one will have some sound. Video Rating: 2 / 5
Question by Katie: Should someone who suffers from alcoholism join the Air force?
My husband is 27 years old. The past year he has come to realize he suffers from alcoholism. He is extreamly smart and alread as a BA degree. But a BA doesnt do much these days. He wants to join the Air force to get training in a specific feild , that he coudl carry out into civilian life. He also hopes to gain his masters there. This past year has been realy hard for us because of his drinking. He has been in out patient since Agust. And 2 weeks ago he went into inpatient. He will be in inpatent till this agust. He hopes with in a few months after getting out to join the Airforce. Im concerned that he will pick drinking up again once he joins . I know people in the military drink a lot. Whne your not working your drinking. Can anyone who has been in the airforce tell me do you think it is a wise decision for him to join? Do they have support group for people who drink? Do they have seperate living quaters for people who dont want to drink? I know a lot fo the reason he drinks is…
because he doesnt have a good job. He says he wants to go and he wont drink while there because he will have a focus and a goal. Im afraid being surrounded by people who drink will make him relapse.
Do people in the airforce drink as much as other branches in the military?
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