Question by hello g: You have all been annoyed with me repeating the question about my neighbor…?
I will list the question below IN CASE you haven’t read it yet. Anyway, him and I had a conversation last night – he is a recovering alcoholic (1 year) and drug addict (11 years clean). I asked him if he’s ever had a sober relationship and he told me he has NOT. He has NEVER had a sober relationship in his life (and he’s 41). Could this be why he hasn’t made a move? Could this be why he acts akward? Because he doesn’t know how to make a move, sober. What are your thoughts?

Here’s the question I asked previously:
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I live in a very small neighborhood and have a very large crush on my neighbor. He’s 41, I’m 28 – we’re both single. I’ve lived in my cabin for 4 months, he’s lived in his for 11 years. I’m almost positive that he’s feelin me, too – but neither of us are making any kind of moves. Maybe it’s because we’re neighbors? I don’t know. But it’s driving me crazy. I don’t know what to do?

He recently came down with pneumonia. He called me last Sunday night 20 minutes after I got home and asked me to bring him some medicine. I ended up taking care of him most of the night and all through the week. He was just so adorable being sick. I made him soup, helped clean, washed his dog, took his temperature, rented him movies… He’s finally (as of last night) starting to feel better. The chemistry we have when it’s him and I alone, is insane. We look at each other in the eyes and you can just tell something is there. There is no denying it. (And I recently graduated from the NANNY to his dog to the AUNTIE – his dog is the most important thing in his life). We live EVERY close to one another and he’ll call me on the phone and we’ll talk for an hour while we’re both in bed – he’ll make comments such as, “Are you naked right now?” And it’s all kind of jokingly, but I think a part of him is really curious.. It’s pretty funny because I open my window and there’s his house – yet we still talk on the phone? When he comes home from work every day, he’ll walk straight over to my house without even going home first. EVERY DAY.

A part of me thinks he may just be a nice guy that wants to be friends but I have to think deeper into that because he almost has a jealous streak when it comes to me and the relationship I have with another male neighbor. He also tells me that we should make the other neighbors think something is going on with us..

Why has he not made a move? MEN – do you honestly think I should make a move or keep things how they are and see what happens? Be real with me please!

The other “MAN” is an old guy with 4 kids that lives across the street. My “crush” knows 100% that I am not into him. I have made that perfectly clear. He’s a very strange man.

Best answer:

Answer by poke
please shorten your question

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Answer by bluesun
try again. we all fail. we are human. next time wil be great ok?

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Question by Joe: worried about alcoholism?
it might sound stupid because of my age(18), but i drink like 11 days out of 14, working in a pub doesn’t help but i love my work. i always wake up feeling like shit and i only feel better after i’ve had a drink. alcoholism runs in my family going back generations. just want to know whether i should be worried or not. thanks x

Best answer:

Answer by Cait
I’d certainly seek some sort of help yes. You say alcohol runs in your family, so you’re already susceptible to it, and for your age that is alot of alcohol to be consuming. A good way to tell if you may have a problem is not just feeling like crap until you’ve had a drink, but more specifically going through some sort of withdraws without it. Like if you hadn’t had a drink yet you would get the shakes, and you would actually feel very ill like you had some sort of flu or cold. Try to go a few days without drinking, and if you’ve experienced any of these symptoms I would certainly seek professional help. Just because you’re 18 doesn’t mean you can’t have a problem, especially if you’re in an environment that constantly exposes you to alcohol.

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Answer by SoUledOut4Christ!
Is it drugs or Jesus by Tim McGraw?

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i jsut cant sleep at night thinking about this and my brother was once a street addict he has been clean for 2 years! so thats the only good news. i dont know what to do. and im hurting so badly. i have withdrawn from my friends at school tyring to help her and its gotten me nowhere.

Best answer:

Answer by Nini
I am so sorry to hear this. addiction is a very serious psychological problem. did you ever think about getting her help. like sending her to rehab. i know that sounds extrem. but if its really that bad then thats what u have to do. the thing with addicts, they need to be whiling to change, if not…they wont! some might have to hit rock bottom before they finally realize what they are do to themselves and their family. try and get your family together and have a heart to heart conversation with her. maybe something is really bothering her thats making her do this.

take care.
I hope for the best for you& your family.

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I would be very grateful if you could help me by telling me what you know about methadone treatment, where you have learned what you know, and what you think about the treatment, or whatever other comments you may have about the topic. I’m looking for as many comments as possible from “the general public”.

Please keep the comments/opinions coming.

Thank you!

Best answer:

Answer by WATCH DOG
Methadone detox is a three phase process designed to rid the methadone addict from the grip of methadone addiction. The most effective methadone treatment combines a safe atmosphere, knowledgeable staff, skilled physicians, effective medications and proper nutrition. The greatest fear methadone addicts have is the fear of methadone withdrawal symptoms. This fear can keep a person in their methadone addiction for years and years. The key to a successful methadone detox is to relieve the addict from the perceived threat of pain, nausea and insomnia. At Orange County Detox we go to great lengths assuage that fear. The fact is, Orange County Detox has developed a methadone treatment program that practically eliminates pain from the methadone detox process. The main concepts employed within our methadone detox process are “efficacy” and “compassion.” Orange County Detox believes in a humane methadone detox for anyone suffering from methadone addiction. The fact is within 24 hours after admission most clients are amazed that they feel so well. We use a specialized methadone detox program just for methadone addicts unlike the protocol methadone detox programs of many other detox centers. We are opponents of the methadone maintenance programs that are found throughout the United States. Even Suboxone maintenance is a dangerous option. Orange County Detox is a suboxone detox center and a believer in total abstinence after opiate detox is complete. Orange County Detox (suboxone detox California) recommends that a methadone addict can never safely use any opiate again. We recommend full disclosure to any and all physicians including dentists for the rest of their life.

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Question by tinkibear21: Any advice about drug addicted fiance?
My fiance is a drug addict and has been for six years. He does not have emotional support from his family and he has no friends. I am the only person he truly cares about and his mother has told me that he has gotten much better since he met me. Unfortunately he still uses. He suffers from depression and Borderline Personality disorder also. Some days he calls rehabs and attempts to do things to get better and others he is negative about his life and future. He uses drugs to compensate for his “sickness” when in reality the drugs are his ultimate sickness. He has to go to jail soon and will be there for at least five months. I’m scared that he will get better while there, but go back to using when he gets out. I don’t know what I should do for him. Please do not say leave him because it will never happen. He is my best friend and I would give my life if only he could get clean, Also please do not suggest 12-step meetings because he is not religious. Can anyone give me some advice?

Best answer:

Answer by milton b
Plan on a long engagement. If you marry him he will turn your life into a living hell. My guess is that he has a fairly serious mental illness and the drugs are self-medication. Thinking that your love is going to change him is delusion, he is in a self reinforcing circle of depression and addiction that will be almost impossible to break. Since you seem determined to continue this relationship the only real advice I can give you is to not trust him. He will steal from you without hesitation to finance his drug habit and there is absolutely nothing to be gained by allowing this to happen.

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Answer by aimee 3xb
The first thing to consider would be the kind of program that the person will undergo. As every individual has different needs, the needs of your friend’s brother should be taken into account when picking a drug treatment program. The qualifications of the staff in the rehab are important too. Look into the medical credentials as well as the license gotten by the drug rehab. This will tell you if the drug rehab has met the standards set for providing quality care. Family counseling or other group therapy sessions should also be taken into account when choosing a program. It would also be good to get a treatment program that includes continuing care because this is the kind of treatment program that is usually effective.

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Question by jakek812: What do you know about rehab? In particular how to they treat cocaine addiction and sex addiction?
So I’m working on a script that’s supposed to cover this topic and I want to make it as authentic as possible. Any information about procedures in rehab, what the average day is like for a person in rehab and how the treatment works, especially for those two disorders, would be extraordinarily helpful. Both personal experiences and links to other sources would be happily accepted.

Best answer:

Answer by d1zy
though i don’t know about the specifics of treating those two drugs i do know this.

treatments often keep patients in limbo. pacified. maybe sleeping a lot, or eating in front of the tv. so their daily life becomes a monotonous whitewash of daytime tv and doritos.

addicts are alert, politically aware and living the law of the jungle in a survival situation. sooner or later, out of boredom, the rehab cases will skip meds to go out for some fun.

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beapartoftheheart.com Bob Forrest speaks in this MusiCares video about the denial of addiction. The “arc of addiction” can start out well and that brings on the rationalization and denial. Success in music can fuel the denial of drug and alcohol addiction which can only go so far before the nosedive begins. That’s when MusiCares® can help. MusiCares® recovery network service were created to identify music people who are in recovery and are willing to offer their support to others going through the recovery process. Please help MusiCares® continue with this important work. Donate to MusiCares & enter to win tickets to the 2012 GRAMMYS! (No purchase necessary)
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Forgive everyone everything? I try forgive everything,”but for the grace of… go I” and at the same time there are consequences. Can we trust, or can they trust, can we include them or can they include us. Sometimes the consequences may not be as we might or they might wish. Yet forgiveness can prevail today and every day… Its Okay to be me… And spiritual! Conscious contact with now is the key finding the truth of living. Truth is spiritual.. Everything, people, places and things are spiritual. Most often what gets in the way of our spiritual journey is denial, thinking we know better and misunderstanding our feelings… Assertive is knowing how I am feeling, why and what can I do? Informed choices are made when I share how I am and why. Empathy is “how are we feeling, why and what can we do?” We include and discuss, look for common ground. Empathy, how we feel, why and shared choices of what we can do together today… Daily Reflections ~ “IT’S OKAY TO BE ME… Time after time newcomers have tried to keep to themselves certain facts about their lives. . . . they have turned to easier methods. . . . But they had not learned enough humility. . . . ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, pp. 72-73 Humility sounds so much like humiliation, but it really is the ability to look at myself — and honestly accept what I find. I no longer need to be the “smartest” or “dumbest” or any other “est.” Finally, it is okay to be me. It is easier for me to accept myself if I share my whole life. If I …
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